WASTED MINI-PUTT COUPONS

Today's theme is going to be a lesson in manners.  Some of you may recall my post from last Friday, entitled 'Friday Night Date Night.'  In that post I alluded to a date that I had gone on.   I also choose not to discuss the details of that date in the event that we married and had children and then said children came across my blog and I would then have to explain why I said their father was kind of boring and not that much fun... As luck would have it, he is not going to be the father to my future children so I have cart blanche to discuss the events of our date at great length should I choose.  I don't, however choose to go into great detail because my moral compass points me to the high road, which incidentally is in the complete opposite direction of crazy bitch town.

Side bar, have you noticed how often I use the word incidentally?  It's almost mind numbing...

What I will say about this gentlemen is that he needs a lesson in etiquette and he needs to grow a set.  Lets call him Ward for the the blog sake, no one is named Ward anymore so I think that's safe.  So Ward and I met on a an on-line dating site.  For a long time I grappled with on-line dating being something that only nerds and shut ins did, and felt it was really not a legitimate way to meet someone worthwhile.  However, now that I am in my 30's, live in a small town that I am not from, and work a regular job, I realize that it is the new normal in social interaction and dating.  In fact I know several people who have met wonderful people on these sites which have led to long term relationships and even a couple of marriages.  So for anyone who is reading this and is on-line dating, but feeling ashamed or like a creepy looser, don't.  You are totally normal and not alone.  

Where was I?  Oh yes, Ward,  so Ward and I met on-line, we chatted back and forth, we texted and then we decided to meet.  All very normal.  The first 2 dates went well enough.  I'm not talking mind blowing conversation and a laugh a minute, but I didn't want to stab him in the eye and he didn't cry (that's another blog), so I called it a success and thought it was worth going out on a few dates, even if it was just for something to do.  Date #3 was where things really started to take a turn for the worse.  I could tell Ward was not being totally forthright with me and all he talked about was work, no matter how hard I tried to steer the conversation to something else.  Also he never made eye contact when he talked.  We planned a date #4 anyway and we went to the glow in the dark mini-putt.  It is now that I should mention that I had recently acquired some free passes to the mini-putt which I won in a charity raffle.  It was coincidence, but very good timing.   We met at the mini-putt facility on Friday night and very early into mini-putt I knew we were in trouble.  You see to me, glow in the dark mini-putt should be full of whimsy and laughs.  A chance to let your hair down and leave your work-a-day woes behind, but again Ward kept yammering on about work.  And I tried to engage him, tried to get him to laugh or loosen up or just make eye contact for god's sake!  Nothing.  I got nothing.  I'd joke about my golf skills or lack there of, talk about something fun I'd done during the day and nothing...  By the time we got to dinner we sat staring at our menus and not speaking.  It was painful to say the least, but then Ward surprised me by asking if I wanted to go catch a movie before I headed home.  I thought "oh my god this thing has a pulse" and said sure.  Unfortunately we had managed to miss the beginning of every movie at the octo-plex by about 10 minutes, so I left with the intention of seeing him again for a movie in a couple of days.  

This is where the manners, etiquette and growing a pair come in, incase you were wondering.  After Saturday we entered radio silence.  I messaged him twice and got no response which I believe I am to take as the end of the relationship or whatever it was.  Now I realize that after 4 mediocre dates, he doesn't owe me a sit down dinner and break-up, but at the very least he could have responded to my texts and said "it was nice to have met you, but I don't think this is what I'm looking for."  That would have been the decent and human thing to do.  But instead Ward took the cowards way out and buried his head in the sand like and ostrich and hoped I'd go away.  I was a little miffed this morning and I won't lie, I nearly did send a text message saying "thanks for nothing."  Cooler heads prevailed after I had some caffein and some words of advice from a friend, "let it go." and I deleted Ward from my contacts, with head held high and a positive outlook that there will be someone else.

The moral of this story is this: Don't waste your mini-putt coupons if you're not 100% certain he/she is worth it.  You'll only regret the missed opportunity to have fun with someone else at mini-putt.  That doesn't seem like it should be the moral.  Ok here's the real moral:  If you decide you're not into it, be upfront with the person.  We're all adults and I'd rather know the truth then waste my time, or in this case, mini-putt coupons.  Yes, that's better, that's the moral.

New side bar, I'm also going to try out some sign offs.  I'm going to try out a few until I find the one that feels right so bare with me.  Hmm.. this sounds like my dating style also....

Ciao for now

(yep I hate that one too)